Oh the carnage. Oh the humanity.
I was leaving my apartment to go to work this morning and noticed an abundance of styrofoam packing peanuts morosely blowing about the halls. As I turned to lock my door, a horrific scene caught my eye. There, sitting in front of my neighbor's door, was a veritable Valentine's bloodbath. What I can only assume was once a ticky-tacky, candy and stuffed animal-filled, cellophane-wrapped Valentine's basket had been reduced to mutilated mayhem. A stuffed toy doggy lay limply, its cold, dead, plastic eyes staring blankly at the sunny day just outside the window. Cellophane waved weakly in the gentle breeze blowing through the hall. And around it all blew the packing peanuts...tiny victims of a senseless act.
But really, I'm curious. Did someone leave the basket outside this neighbor's door hoping to give them a lovely little post-V-day surprise and it fell victim to an angry, hungry passerby? Or did said neighbor find the gift on his/her doorstep, for whatever reason fall prey to a fit of passionate rage, and tear the gift to bits (carefully keeping the candy for himself/herself)? What is your theory?
My car's odometer rolled over to 132,000 miles on my way home today. Let's hear it for the hoopty. Woot.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Um, did you read the address label on it? That was from me. I sent it on Monday. . .
Ok, not really. WHoa! Do YOU live in the ghetto, TOO?! Fortunately there were no dismembered stuffed animals in my hallway - just an empty pill bottle with the label ripped off . . . um, yes. So at least someone in my building was feeling good last night. ;) Aight, I'm out. See you 3 weeks from today!!!
nmmtjmt
maybe the toy dog came to life and was trying to get out, and he ate the candy (wrapper and all, because, you know...opposable thumbs), and he finally busted out only to realize that HE can't breathe air...
anhdejrf (that is almost a word)(this was in my first try at this post)
wpdmv (winter park department of motor vehicles...sigh, colorado...)
duh! Your neighbor GAVE the gift as a timely valentine's day gift, but put the WRONG girlfriend's name on the card. So she returned it with her full gratitude expressed.
Why, oh why doesn't anyone think of the children?? OH THE HUMANITY!
Post a Comment